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back pain still bothering me years after surgery

I had back surgery a little over two years ago and have been in pain ever since.
While it releaved some of the pain, I csnt do daily functions such as work, sit or srsnd for long periods of time, pick my kids up, basically what you would do on any normal day.
Its been hard on everyone and its to the point now where the people that are the closest to me, are wanting answers on why I can't do things. It hurts when the people that are the closest to you, don't understand the constant pain and physical enegry it takes me to do everyday things.
I'm not one to complain and show how much pain I'm in everyday. I don't want that burden on everyone but I wish they would understand why some days its just hard to even get out of bed.
What I'm looking for is some artcles, facts, anything really to try to explain my situation to them and to show them that I'm not the only person like this. No one seems to understand that I'm doing all I can. I'm only 31 and it looks like there's a good chance this is my life from now on. I've not a good canidate for another surgery, physical therapy, pain management, doesn't seem to help.
I just don't want the peopke that are closest to me leaving or think I'm not pulling my weight just because they don't see me on the ground thriving in pain everyday.
Any help, stories, articles, would be great for my own knowledge. I just can't seem to find abything online as easy as I thought I could.


  • First let me say welcome to spine-health. Have a look around as you are not alone, there are many of in chronic pain. Your what we would call new to the game of chronic pain. First it is a process of learning to deal with it, and this is a good source. You can find members, articles and so on here that will help you find ways to deal with it. With that said what kind of pain are you having. The very first thing you have to do is get in touch with the pain. Many of us have used journals to get to the pain. So for example is the pain greater in the morning or night, is it stabbing, knawing, aching, throbbing and so on. What type of pain level are you in? Before you say the level look at a pain chart and see how it is rated. If you say a 10, then you belong in the ER as that is the worst possible pain you can be in and would do anything. While some days you might feel you would do anything to get relief, we are talking a number that makes has you sitting in the hospital and even with medications screaming. What makes the pain better and what makes it worse? So first get to know your pain.

    Second have you had surgery, if I read that right? What kind of surgery did you have? Do you have hardware and if so is it still in place? When is the last time you have had images taken and what did they say? What types of doctors have you seen and what types of treatments have you had to this point to manage the pain? What types of medications have you taken, and what is the muscle relaxer you have taken already.

    Post the surgery did you feel better for sometime, or did the pain never go away from the minute you woke up. How many doctors have you seen or is just the surgeon whom operated on you? Why do they say another surgery won't help?

    Sorry for so many questions but it will help others members to answer your post with more information. But the journal will help you to get to know your pain and also help you better describe it to the doctors.

    I know you already been fighting with the pain for 2 years, but don't lose hope yet and think you will have a life time of it. It might be a matter of finding the right blend that will help you manage the pain. Although there are things like SCS that have gotten many out living normal busy lives. So don't lose hope yet that this is your destiny.

    For your family and friends and whom don't understand there is a letter floating around the forums that you can print off and put on your ice box so others can understand what you are going through. While I don't talk much about the pain I am into anyone, they just know, somehow. I don't try to justify to anyone, or tell them how bad I feel. I figure that we all get thrown things in life and this is mine to deal with. So you shouldn't try to justify to others how bad your feeling or feel guilty that your in pain. Here is a link to a thread where others have discussed what it feels like, that you might feel more comfort in reading. http://www.spine-health.com/forum/pain/chronic-pain/a-day-life-a-person-chronic-pain.

    I just thought I would stop by and welcome you to spine-health. Look forward to reading more of your post and how you progress finding some answers. If I can ever do anything for you don't hesitate to pm me. Take care and look forward to seeing you around the forums.
  • I'm so sorry to hear about your pain. I'm 34 and have been dealing with excruciating intractable pain. My husband left me, my friends were the next to leave, and even most of my family has left, my mom and dad help. However, I think they look at my pain somewhat suspiciously, and believe I could do better if I really tried. They have NO idea how hard I have to try to do the easiest things for other people. Just wanted to let you know you're not alone.
  • thoracic spine painthoracic spine pain Posts: 566
    edited 07/10/2013 - 12:58 PM
    I gave my story I wrote from this site to my GP. He read it. Even though he knows me, I don't think it really sunk in, He is treating me noticeably differently now as I still think he didn't understand spine pain - how can you if you've never had it. Also sent it to the specialist I am seeing so he can read it as well. Explains it better and I don't have to go over the same old story a over and over. It is hard to explain when the pain is constant.

    Also found out if you say 'damgaged 'central nervous system' instead of back pain people seem to understand more. I didn't put two and two together so now I say I have damaged my central nervous system.

    I also lost friends, who wants them anyway - as I used to do lots for other people and they just expected me to be the same after this. Remember cooking dinner for a whole lot of people one night , and asking someone to help and peel the potatoes, cause that hurts - he got pissed off and had to tell him I only ask other people to help if it hurts me - serving it - doing all the washing up - I was in agony. No-one helped except with a bit of washing up. Someone asked to take a photo of me 'cause they thought I looked good NOT, was in so much pain - and it really showed in the photo.

    No-one can see your pain except in your eyes if they have had pain.Read the intractable pain manual on this site and you'll see what you will come up against. Hang in there pain sucks, very few people understand - I would never wish this on any one else but sometimes would like them to just have it for one day - that would be enough - it's a different story if you have had it for years.

    And the people who left - so shallow - who needs them anyway.
  • when I had my first back operation I am now 47 and I have been to hell and back .with pain and sleep deprivation .I have also had a fusion ALIF and another back operation in between .my pain and tolerance to pain relief has gone through the roof and now I have possible bowel problems {serious} and the pain from that is hell too ..sometime we can forget that just because we have one health problem we can have another .I wish you well and hope your having a better day have a read of the spoons theory and a letter to a normals they are very good letters to let someone that's not in pain read
    1997 laminectomy
    2007 repeat laminectomy and discectomy L4/L5
    2011 ALIF {L4/L5/S1}
    2012 ? bowel problems .still under investigation
    2014 bladder operation may 19th 2014
  • terror8396tterror8396 Posts: 1,832
    edited 07/12/2013 - 2:50 AM
    i hate to be a debbie downer but i work and have had 4 back fusions and have been in chronic pain for 12 years. i see my pain dr every 2 months for refills and a neurosurgeon about every year to get checked out. no one, family co workers, friends don't want to hear about our pain. i never tell anyone if i was up all night due to pain. i get out of bed, have my wife help me get dressed and go to work. i have a couple of pages of accommodations for my work. no one cares and they don;t want to hear about it. they feel if it is that bad then retire. i don't want to retire because working helps me and i enjoy teaching. but next year i will be 67 so i will retire. my family does not want to hear and my sister in law specifically said one time that we will not be talking about back pain. keeping complaining will make it worse. my advice, don't complain, try to work or keep busy and don't lie on the couch all day. it makes it worse. remember no one cares and no one wants to hear our problems. that is the cold facts of life with chronic pain. if you need to complain, post on this site and vent
    good luck
    I have 4 fusions from L5-3, the latest last May '12 where they fixed my disc that broke.They went through my side this time. I take 40 mg of oxycontin 4x a day and 4 fenatyl lollipops 300 micro gms 4x a day.
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