Hello, my name is Tovi, and one year ago, my back hurt, and didn't stop.
I think you know how this story ends up.
I am 21 years old- "much to young" as the doctors say- to be having all the pain and degeneration I am suffering. I was first scrutinized as having some sort of psychological fabrication of pain, but after months of persistence it was discovered that I had an incredibly large tear in my L5 spine, and bulging discs all up and down. In addition, fibromyalgia hit me like a mac truck, and it has been a road of tears, pain, and heartbreak.
I don't want to go on a horribly long tangent, but I am brought here because my heart is screaming. Not one soul around me has any idea what it has been like for me; I break down out of pain and frustration almost every day, which is hard in itself for me to face. I feel so alone, I can't even afford acupuncture, epidurals, or surgery. I fear I'm going to be on morphine or hydrocodone the rest of my life. I was one of the most lively, hyper people around, who loved to laugh and had so much to say. Now, I can't seem to find any words or the strength to go to the store.
So here I am, trying to reach out before I give up... I always try and keep my spirit filled with light, but lately it has been a downhill battle, as I am ever-consumed with more darkness. I found out that I also have severe ovarian cysts, and I can only wonder if my body is reflecting my angst, for lack of a better word.
I promise, I'm quite friendly ^_^..I really do hope to make some friends and be there for other people who are suffering-I truly understand and have a great deal of hope for us all;
if we keep communicating our successes and failures, I believe we will eventually bring ourselves closer to that sweet, pain-free day...