Thanks to all of you, whether you realise it or not, you did save me the other day. Even the more confronting of you (yes you know who you are
The pain hasn't changed, it still sucks. My attitude has changed. I realised my family is worth fighting for.
So I have set my new plan into action.
Step 1. get up and exercise more, eat healthier, take pride in my appearance, lose the extra weight that's come on from immobility
Step 2. bit by bit, day by day clean this damn pigsty of a house, it makes me feel worse living in filth
Step 3. continue to connect with the people here who know how it feels because you are one hell of an amazing bunch of people.
Thanks from the bottom of my heart to everyone who had a hand in bringing me back to the land of the living as painful as that may be. :X