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Its amazing just how fast something terrible can happen

dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,839
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:42 AM in Matters of the Heart
I just got off the phone with my wife. One of our good friends was working on his house yesterday on a ladder and while coming down, lost his balance and fell about 6 feet right on his back.

He is in the hospital now with a good portion of his spine shattered. From early reports its from about T5 down to the Lumbar discs. They did emergency surgery to remove vertebrae and disc fragments away from the nerve.

Right now, he has no feeling from the knees down. The surgeon has painted a pretty grim picture. He believes that the paralysis is permanent and that in fact it could go higher up to his waist level.

I just saw him the other day in our wine shop. We were talking about when my boat is ready so we can do evening cocktail/dinner cruises. Now, he just might be faced with
permanent paralysis.

It can happen oh so fast. You know so many times we take things for granted and we fret over little things.

My heart is down, not only because he is a good friend, but because I do know the pain/suffering a spinal patient has to go through. But his is worse. I know that I will need to spend time with him talking to him and just being there as a friend.

Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com


  • This is so tragic; I am so sorry about your friend's accident. Right now he is in good hands and getting the best treatment possible.Hopefully somehow he can overcome this serious injury and get back on his feet again some day. I know you'll be there faithfully by his side and he is fortunate to have a friend like you. Our thoughts and prayers are with him and his family too.
  • It is amazing how life can change in just the blink of an eye. This man is lucky to have you as a friend. He has someone to talk to that can understand much of what he is dealing with and much of what he has to face.

    Hang in there,

  • Prayers for him and his family and friends. It's such a shock when this happens to someone close to you. My brother shattered his spine from falling 3 stories 25 years ago and now he's 51 and still limps but is able to walk. I pray this for your friend. We can hope and pray for the best. Take care. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • Oh Ron, I am so sorry! This is just terrible news! Sending well wishes and prayers for strength, courage and comfort to him and his family & friends. How blessed he is to have you are a friend!

    I am so sorry to hear your news! Praying! Shari
  • but with time and your unwavering friendship i'm sure those cocktail cruises will happen, you may need to install a ramp, but friendship and determination will see him through this and he will forge a new life just as you have.
    My thoughts are with him, his family and you at this time.
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,839
    I can not thank you all enough for your well wishes.
    To me, this is what Spine-Health is all about.

    Bonding - Even though we may never meet we are on the same wave length

    Caring - That is when our hearts pour out to another one that needs help, doesnt matter where the problem is, we just not that another member is hurting.

    Awareness - Knowing that we, collectively have an extra edge on many others. We can learn, we can understand so much about spinal problems.

    And the best, I dont even have a word or phrase to describe it. Its just something that we as members can feel from others. We understand each other and when someone expresses their concern about you or other situations, you know it is heartfelt.

    I just want to let all of you know that I appreciate your kind words and thoughts. Most of you know by now, that I am a firm believer in our mind and positive thinking and attitudes. That is what can really help us get through the toughest times.

    Now, it is my turn to give my friend all the positive thoughts and strength to get through it all.

    Again my thanks to all of you
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • just... so, so sorry... to be reading this news of your friend, Ron.

    This news truly has hit home over here and my family and I will be saying many prayers for your friend and his family.

    If there is any way I can help, please let me know.

    How wonderful it is that your friend and his family have you to reach out to for support. With your shoulder surgery coming up, you both will be recovering together. You even have the opportunity to be in each other's company during your recoveries. That is something I think we all wish for, at times. Just someone close by, who knows exactly how we are feeling. You'll have that opportunity and what a blessing it will be for your friend.

    Please keep us posted with any news you receive.

    Best wishes to your friend,

  • Sorry to hear about your friend Ron, its a terrible accident that will leave life changing events in your friends future and he is going to need the support of friends like you.

    I haven't posted as much lately because I have felt that my back pain and on going back issues pale in comparrison to my mum being diagnosed with lung cancer, she is in England, I am in the USA............feeling so far away and helpless. I recently lost a friend to lung cancer that died within 3 months of diagnosis, she was only 43!! I was going to be scheduled for another decompression surgery in June when school gets out (I am a TA), but now I will be heading home to take care of my mum and put my surgery on hold.

    Life is short, we never know what awaits us around the corner. We should have love and compassion for each other. Time spent on anger, revenge or bitterness is a waste of engery that could be spent in more constructive avenues.

    I wish everyone well and pray for all those in pain that better days lie ahead.

    Special prayers for your friend Ron as he recovers in the hospital.

  • Ron,

    So sorry to hear this happen! I am sending positive energy towards him, his family and you! Like was said on this thread, having you as a friend will be a big bonus for him, both as bonded friend support, and a real good idea what he has to deal with, and what it will/could be like. Fingers crossed that his paralysis does not move up, and he is able to walk again when he heals. Take care. *HUGZ*

    PCTF C4 - T2, Laminectomies C5, C6 & C7. Severe Palsy left arm/hand.
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,839
    Your words and ideas are something that everyone should read and re-read.
    They are so simple, but so very very dear and true.
    In one short post, you captured so much about life.

    My thanks to you for your post
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • Let me add my voice to what has been expressed in the above posts. I too send my prayers for a small miracle, that he will walk again.

    They are able to accomplish so much now. With you standing by him, urging him on and providing all the special insights pertaining to things spinal that you have, you will be able to assist him in finding the very latest care that is available. Your strength will be a source of strength for him as he moves through his recovery.

  • Such tragic news about your friend. There's really several lessons in this for all, that our lives can change in an instant and live it to the fullest, that there are others far worse off than we are who need our support, and that we can make such a difference in someone else's life. Your friend is so fortunate to have you there. You'll both be in my thoughts.

    In time, I can see you both sipping cocktails on that boat....

    Best to you,

  • ron,
    how horrible how things have change for your friend.
    with his families support and yours he will be greatly loved.
    truely life is a constant change and alot of not good changes..
    i will keep your friend and you in daily prayers.
    what a good way to look at things mari..
    neck,bone spurs pain started 04, back issues and fusion l4,l5 06~hardware removed.
    good few yrs. 09 pain sharp, numbness feet,legs, diagnosed fibro, neurop. legs.lung issues.
    daily goal do good thing for someone.
  • Ron, just wanted to stop by and let you know that I am thinking of you and your friend. Well wishes and prayers are coming your way! Shari
  • I sorry about your friend. I know you will be one of his best friends, standing beside him all the way as he recovers. life is full of surprises so let's hope and pray that he improves more than the drs. think.

    I learned a long time ago that life can change in a heartbeat. In one heartbeat your life can be changed forever. Life is priceless and we need to appreciate every day because you never know what tomorrow brings for you,your family and friends. We do tend to dwell on the small stuff sometimes and then along comes something Big to put things back in perspective.

    Ron, I will pray for your friend and his family. I know that he is lucky to have a good friend like you and with your experience to lean on, Your wife, as a nurse, will help him immensely too.

    Take care.
  • Sorry to hear about your friend,you take care.
  • So sorry to read about your friend.

    It is amazing how a fall from 6 ft can do so much damage. A friend of mine fell 20 ft onto a concrete floor and didn't do much except pull some muscles (over 40 yrs too).

    I will say a pray for your friend that he gains feeling back and doesn't lose more. It is great that you will be right by his side to help him thru his horrible tragedy. Thumbs up to you Ron.

    Keep us posted on how he is doing please and thank you.

  • I just found this thread Ron. I am so very sorry for your friend. He will remain in my thoughts/prayers ♥

    Please do keep us updated on him.
    L1 - S2 "gone" useless in 1 way or another. DDD. RA. Bone Spurs. Tons of nerve damage/issues. Stenosis. Both knees replaced. 50 yrs old. I had a great fall (hence my user name) at age 41 and it has been a domino effect every since.
  • Ron,
    Words are difficult to come by.

    When I first read your post I just stared into space. I'm forever asking my husband to just get off that ladder and hire someone else to do that. Of course, I can admitt I thought of myself and immediately placed myself in their position. Grrr...

    Then I found myself asking the age old question. Why this AWFUL tragedy? But then the messages received from the event for me was loud and clear.




    BE HAPPY NOW not some date in the future when ??? has to happen first.

    I'm so sorry this happened to your friend and I believe you will be there for him. I am a strong believer, as well, in positive thinking and am sure you will be able to help him through.

  • Ron, this is a horrible event that has happened. I just want you to know that I care, and please tell your friend that miracles do happen. This will be a difficult time for him, but I fully believe that things happen for a reason and there will be a lot of lessons learned through his trials. I know you'll be there supporting your friend all the way, and your time here on spine health has helped to prepare you to give that support.
    Surviving chronic pain one day at a time, praying for a reprieve because living another 40 years like this doesn't sound too fun!
  • Sorry to hear about your dear friend, you know from personal experience that the positive and affirmative thought patterns are the most healing promoting of recovery. You are in a unique position, you can help him keep the positive outlook to heal and heal the mind and body as well as can be.
    tell him were thinking of him and wish for a speedy and full recovery!
    William Garza
    Spine-Health Mod

    Welcome to Spine-Health

  • I know that right now is not the time, but when your friend is ready, I've got a book recommendation. I know another person on SH is reading this book now. I am not a person of deep religious beliefs and yet I found strength in this man's strength. I'm not sure I believe from his account he really died, though I believe he believes it, but what is important about the book is how he went through the anger, denial, and forced himself through recovery.

    90 Minutes in Heaven is the book. It is a short book but very inspirational even if you are not a Christian. My problems seem minimal compared to what this man dealt/deals with.

    I'm sorry to hear that this happened to your friend. I am sure that you will stand by him and help him through his recovery. I hope he proves the doctors wrong.
  • Ron,
    Your friend, his family, and you are still in my thoughts and prayers. Puts things in perspective. I do not say that with any disrespect or flippantly.

    How are you doing? How is he doing? It is possible you have posted and I've missed it or it's just not something you feel the need to share.

    I will, of course, continue to pray as specifically as I can and send positive thoughts and energy your way.
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,839
    everyone's kind and sincere posts. Yes, no question I will be there for him.. In reality, I am about the only person in our circle of friends who has experienced so many spinal problems.

    I know its not going to be an easy time for him. He has already had a couple of surgeries in attempt to stabilize this upper lumbar area

    My many thanks to all of you.. I really means a lot ot me and I do appreciate it so much
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
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