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Confessions from a long time member

dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,833
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:45 AM in Spine-Health Announcements
here are several things that I would like to open up to everyone on this site.

1 - I've been a member of Spine-Health for over 3 years, started as a general member, and then was given the role as a moderator. After a period of time I was giving the role of Administrator.

2 - I am a spinal patient. I have had multiple lumbar and cervical surgeries. I have permanent nerve damage in my right leg, I have a number of herniated discs in my thoracic area as well as one in the lumbar region. I recently had a complete shoulder replacement, which was done because of the advanced arthritis which degenerated my shoulder.

Many people feel that as the System Administrator of Spine-Health I should refrain from posting on medical or other issues. I should only step in where there are problems or announcements need to be made.

Thats not me. I post as a member and I post as an Administrator. I feel that there are many areas that I can post that can help just one person... And if I can do that, it is worth everything.

Some folks may think I get on a soapbox , almost preaching various things about Spine-Health and various conditions/treatments. Some folks may think I am too harsh or open when I make some posts. Some folks may think I am too easy or light with some of the fun I try to put into these forums.

I cant apologize for any of those actions. What I can apologize for and will, is for those folks that I have hurt.
I am not talking about any of my tough love talks, but more about if I insulted anyone.

For me, I can not perform at my best if I need to be one or the other. I need to be me, the person. Just so happens that means being an Administrator as well as a member.

I can promise that I will continue to behave the way I have and that I will try to be as fair as I can be dealing with all situations

I am open, I am open to everything. You want to complain, you want to thank me, you want to point out some problems in what I said, PLEASE I want you to do that.

As always, I want to thank the owners of Spine-Health for giving their trust in me and for all the members whom I try to help.

Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com


  • sunny1966ssunny1966 VIRGINIAPosts: 1,385
    I think you do a great job as administrator. I know it must be hard at times to deal with everyone else's problems when you have so many of your own. I know you are a fair person and I'm glad you're here to keep the forums sailing smoothly. I don't know what goes on behind the scenes so I know I can't even guess at all the messages and emails that you have to deal with. I think that a lot of problems on the forums is that we read emotions into posts that aren't really there. It's easy to misinterpret the tone. I'm guilty of that. I know pain makes my fuse kind of short at times so I try to watch what I say. (Remember I said "try")
    I want to thank you for all that you do to make this a place for all of us depend on. I appreciate you and all the authority team. I don't know what I'd do now without SH. This forum and all of my friends here mean a lot to me. Thanks Ron for being a friend.
    Hope you have a good day.
  • My husband and I have found your posts informative and interesting. I have never seen a negative side to your postings. But, as in any organization, there will be friction between members and misunderstandings that grow into major issues. Don't envy you the job but appreciate how you are doing it.
  • I know that for me, I personally want straight answers from someone who's been around the block and you've been around the block more than once. Because you've been dealing with spine issues for so long, I think we can learn more from you than you realize.

    I also think that any one of us can offend another member at any time (I know I have), it's the nature of forums with a large number of members, so it's bound to happen. But you're honest, caring and open about how you feel and what you know and we need that. If anyone take offense, all they have to do is look at some of your past posts to realize that you have nothing but good intentions.

    As for your sense of humor, well I love your dry sense of humor and witty banter, so you make me laugh, sometimes when I need it most so don't stop that.

    I think you're a great person and administrator and I personally like you just the way you are. You're our patriarch and are very much appreciated in many ways.

  • I agree with Cath: I want to hear from you because you have been dealing with the Beast for a long time. We all can learn from each other. I think it would be weird if you didn't post as yourself, not "the Administrator".

    You are also (as many others are) a great example of living your life despite the pain: I love that since you have retired you volunteer, share your knowledge of wine, administer this site, etc. We spineys need to hear from others the good and the bad, no sugarcoating.

    So please, keep posting as yourself.

  • I just wanted to say that I have ready many of your threads and posts as a memeber and administrator and always found you to be sincere.

    I say keep being yourself and keep doing what you are doing, it's a job well done!!!

    With the highest of regards,
  • Ron,
    I am going to have to admit to being a little "befuddled" here.

    Let me see if I can get this right. There are some here who think that it is some kind of conflict of interest for you to post as an administrator and then post offering advice or post as a regular member? In the same time you are offering explanation for why you are who you are and post the way you do as a regular member?

    My response to your post as an administrator: I would imagine you’re not out to win any popularity contest. After all, you have a job to do and usually the boss isn't the most well liked guy. He just can't be. Heck, his decisions just can't make everyone happy. How could it be any other way? Does EVERYONE like all the emails or MEMOS they get from their boss?

    My thoughts to your post as a long time member of Spine Health: It has been said, you have "been around the block." Ron, you have developed a certain posting style and have a lot of personal experience to offer. No "confession" should be needed. Oh yeah, right, we do hold our leaders to a higher level of expectation. Well, OK then. I guess.

    Goodness knows there are plenty of different styles on this forum and just as many personal experiences. I think it has already been determined It is up to the reader to know this and not take these post literally or personally but seek the professional opinion of their doctors. Why can’t we do the same with each other’s posting style?

    Honestly, who here hasn’t developed their own posting style and passions? I won’t, but I could start naming who I can count on to offer me right to the point no nonsense advice, who I can count on when it is time to tell me to ditch mine and find a new doctor, who will tell me when I need to take a look at the meds I am taking, who will tell me when I need to consider the psychological aspect of the pain, who will offer me their prayers, and who will send me gentle hugs. I know who will use the humor I love and who will not be the least bit happy with mine, as warped as it sometimes can be. I can appreciate it all as I do your no nonsense sometimes philosophical mind provoking post.

    My thoughts to your posting in both manners. As long as it is always clear, in each post, whether you are posting as an administrator or a member of Spine Health (which I find they are) and are abiding by the rules, I really don’t see what the problem is.
  • I like this quote....

    “Live life fully while you're here. Experience everything. Take care of yourself and your friends. Have fun, be crazy, be weird. Go out and screw up! You're going to anyway, so you might as well enjoy the process. Take the opportunity to learn from your mistakes: find the cause of your problem and eliminate it. Don't try to be perfect; just be an excellent example of being human.”
    Anthony Robbins

    Ron, I think you are an excellent example of being human.

    Thank you,

  • i think there are times when people know what they don't want to hear... and there are a lot of people who don't want to say what someone else might not want to hear(even if that person knows in their heart that it's a possibility) I read something this morning that made me think... oh boy, you're going to hear it about that one.... even as I thought, how true what you said was... it doesn't Have to be that.. but it could be, so it needed to be said.

    I've only been a member for a bit and I read more than I post...but I've (almost) always appreciated your position... whether you're posting or admin'ing. The one time I didn't "agree" with what you'd done (a member banned), I still understood the need for you to do so.

    I say, keep on keepin on....you handle the two sides of you just fine here.

  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,833
    to blush, but Marianne, you did a real good job at it...

    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • You are doing a great job I greatly appreciate your posted. We can't always be spot on and sometimes we can offend pople and not mean. I think you do well separating yourself as admin/memb er. You have such a wealth of knowledge I would hate for that to go. Keep up the good work!!
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,833
    I have always felt that I could post as a member as well as an administrator and not allow the two to get confused.

    It wasnt until recently that some folks felt that I should keep my personal input at bay.

    Well, thats not me, I want to talk, I want to exchange ideas, I want to share what I can.

    I am so grateful to all of you who have allowed me to do this.
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • That name suits you. You are, I think, the quintessential father of Spine-Health. And, like any father, the kids aren't always going to be happy with the discipline, or advice that they give.
    I can't imagine a better person who is more suited to the job that you have here, you are the perfect fit. It makes me sad to think that you felt you had to make this post, you shouldn't have to explain yourself, or apologize for any posts that you have made. One of the mottos we have for leadership in the military is to be "firm, fair and friendly" and I believe you own that. As always, keep up the amazing work you do here, both as an administrator, and with the fatherly advice you give as a member.
    APROUD CANADIANveteranButNOTa doctor, my thoughts are my own
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