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I am so angry. I desperately need someone who understands

SassySammieSSassySammie Posts: 3
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:59 AM in Matters of the Heart
A little over 4 years ago, I was in a car accident. I was rear-ended at a stoplight. There was no blood. All my limbs are intact. But my life has never been the same.

I have been in constant pain ever since. I am 24 years old, and I have IDD (internal disc disruption) of the L5-S1. I've been through countless medications, physical therapy, chiropractic, facet injections, radiofrequency, and most recently a discogram.

I should be happy that we now know WHY my back hurts, but I can't help but feel cheated. I will most likely need to go through a painful back surgery to correct the damage. And this girl, this careless girl, walked away with a $175 ticket.

Many of you have endured a discogram. You know how awful it is. I cried the whole way through. When my dad came into the PACU, I cried. And all I could choke out was, "They hurt me."

It's not fair. And I'm old enough to know that life isn't fair. But a traffic ticket for following Too Close is nothing compared to what I've lived with.

Does anyone out there understand this? Does it get better? I don't see how it can.


  • i understand you kiddo. when i was your age, as most young people do at that age, was thinking about boyfriends, marriage, kids, buying a house, playing hockey, getting a better job, shopping, going to concerts, buying a new car, etc. etc. it makes me feel sad when i hear about young people who are struggling with medical issues, particularly pain.

    i have never had a discogram but have heard they hurt. i have had 3 surgeries though, including a multi-level spinal fusion with instrumentation. if i could offer any advice i would say to REALLY think about the pros and cons of surgery. do not enter into it lightly.

    hang in there kiddo. we're around if you wanna chat.
  • The doctors still dont know what causing my pain, IM frustrated & upset. I WOKE UP WITH A BAD HEADACHE on May 9th 2009 and it is still here.Ive had several procedures done along with lots of medications, and its still here. I dont know where to turn.
  • All I can say is im sorry. Was ordered a discogram but have yet to schedule it. I actually want a fusion but need to put it off for financial reasons. So I figure, why have the discogram. Trying every other option first with little to no enthusiasm. I'm 28 and feel my back is stealing my life from me. So surely we have experienced some of the same emotions. Some people have nearly 100% success with surgery, hope you are one of them if you decide to have the procedure.
  • I am so, so sorry for your pain. A discogram sounds extremely painful, but is something I never had. However, I have had 3 back surgeries in my life. 2 of these involved multi-level fusions with insertion of metal rods.

    You always have the option of adding to the other driver's $175.00 ticket by suing her. I urge you to consider doing this.

    I want you to know that I pray your situation will be resolved through the grace of God.

  • I just want you to know that my heart hurts for you. I, too have had to have had to have two additional surgeries due to someone else s negligence and I will never be the same again.

    I've come to the point in my life though that I have decided to learn from it and move into a better times simply because I have no choice. I have a very depressive personality and if I continued to focus on the doctors willful negligence, and everything it has cost me and my family, I would probably be dead by now.

    I just want you to know I understand your pain and you are not alone.
    Dec10 Fusion due to grade 2 spondylolisthesis and sciatica. L5/S1. Failed.
    Aug11 Hardware Removal, Dural Tear, Foot Drop
    Dec11 Salvage fusion at same place. Also a failure.
    August 2012 Spinal cord stimulator
  • To the OP, I'm so sorry that your youth was taken from you. I hope you find a solution to your pain. If not a solution, a manageable level. I developed mine young too. Mine is not as bad as yours, but I can still relate, and I can understand your frustrations.

    I'll jump in this thread too. I'm 32 and my mysterious lumbar pain started at 25. At 29 I developed a cervical bulge. Now they're cycling off of each other and causing all sorts of heck. They don't know what's causing my lumbar pain even though there's a disc bulge there too.

    I was an athlete, outdoorsman, and fairly normal guy before all of this. Now I'm soft, 20lbs overweight, and trying to keep my significant other happy enough to where she doesn't want to leave me. I'm not even a fraction of the man I once was. Lately there hasnt been a single night of un-interupted sleep.

    Tuesday a PM sent me to a chiropractor to be worked on. He hurt me bad. I'm praying it's acute, gosh I cannot deal with another chronic back issue. Since this guy hurt me I've been even more obsessed to find answers. This is really taking over my life and I've never been more determined to fight back. If there's no procedure to help me, there must be something. I'm not taking suffer as an answer anymore. I sincerely hope you find a way as well.
  • You can add me to the list of others who feel like you do. 3/10/04 at 8:24am the old me died and the new me was born. I was also rear ended by a large truck while stopped at a traffic light. Most of my issues are cervical with occasional low back pain. I did not sue the man who hit me, but if I had it to do again, I definitely would have. Your life is forever changed because of someone elses negligence. I can tell you over the years I have been lucky using a blend of things to reduce my pain level. Medications, PT, exercising, massage etc. have all helped greatly. Surgery is not an option for me because there are too levels to fix according to 3 different doctors. I wish you the best going forward.
  • I was sitting at the stoplight and the car that was coming up from the intersection behind me didn't bother to stop and rammed me from behind and I am still in pain after a 2 level fusion. I feel cheated and hate life almost all the time. People tell me not to dwell on it, but I can't help it. I'm in pain all of the time and thats all I can think about. My surgeon thinks that one more level will fix me for good (yeah right we all know how fusion isnt permanent) but if I can feel just a little bit better for a few more years then I'd take that over popping drugs all day and it barely helping.

    I think its ok to feel the way we feel. Until others have been in our shoes they cannot tell us how to feel. Some days I feel like ending it all and some other days I feel like finding out where that person lives and taking them out. I sound crazy and its because I am just sick of being in constant pain and feel like I need to just get it out. Sometimes screaming like a person with tourettes helps. If I wasn't in pain I'd probably would do something like hit a punching bad or go to the batting cage.
  • MetalneckMetalneck Island of Misfit toysPosts: 1,364
    Don't you have legal recourse against this person - their insurance company - and or their "estate"?

    Not that $ will help with pain and suffering but it may provide some forms of future relief. Have you discussed all of this with an attorney yet?

    And yes ... I understand your pain ... I have had 5 cervical surgeries to date and am waiting to hear about my lumbar status this week.

    Bless and keep you,

    Spine-health Moderator
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