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Missed the step again

ldavis2333lldavis2333 Posts: 108
edited 06/11/2012 - 9:01 AM in Back Surgery and Neck Surgery
Missed the step again, The step is right outside my bedroom door. I did catch myself and landed on the heel of my foot. I think I have less feeling in the bottom of my feet. My primary care wants me to space out the vicodin 5/350 to 1 every 4 hours. I am now taking it 2 in the am and 2 in the pm to get any relief and it is not much.

I needed to do a few things around the house. My husband soaked his foot and I tried to clean it up. The abscess is all the way down to the bone. I am so scared he's going to lose his leg. He takes good care of me and I am not capable of taking care of him right now. God love him, he got up at 6:30 this morning to go to the food pantry.

Clearly we need to move into disabled housing and that could take a long time. Getting the bathroom fixed is going to be huge. I m looking into churches and youth groups to see what help is out there.

I have been through case management. I've had counselors assessing my situation and coming to the house. My insurance changed to Medicare. I have called every agency in the state of MA. I have their phone number and will call them back to see if I can reopen my case.

Going to call my Primary Care tomorrow for pain meds. I just don't know what to say that will make a difference. Once I sense her attitude, I get mad and have to try hard to control myself.

Going to lay down on my Sister's couch. Got to get out of here for a while.

Thank you for putting up with my complaining. I am not used to talking so much about me.


  • j.howiejj.howie Brentwood, Ca., USAPosts: 1,730
    So complain away, and get it off of you chest,at the same time. Sometimes it feels good to just let it fly.
    Click my name to see my Medical history
    You get what you get, not what you deserve......I stole that from Susan (rip)
    Today is yours to embrace........ for tomorrow, who knows what might be starring you in the face!
  • SavageSavage United StatesPosts: 5,476
    ...feel free to talk as much as you want. Even just getting it out helps immensely..for me anyway. Helps me feel so not alone.

    Sounds like you are doing much of the right things...in being proactive with your care ..and your husband.

    When you go to doc...please do not worry. If you are in need to cry out of frustration..then you cry. That is also more for doc to work with..in being able to see just how frustrating and out of control your pain and situation has become.

    Sometimes, for myself...I may think I sense attitude..and indeed sometimes it is there..but sometimes docs have bad day..things on their mind.. so as patient need to communicate as clearly as possible and tell doc all of the good, and the bad and the ugly... :)

    Much good thoughts for you and your husband and I pray doc will see all you need and help you with getting the ball rolling.

    PM anytime also if you want. :)
    Spine-Health Moderator
    Please read my medical history at: Medical History

  • I went to my Sister's this afternoon for a few hours by myself. It was so nice, I hated to leave. My brother stopped by too. He kept apologizing for not calling me. I told him not to worry about. I know he's dealing with a lot himself. Seeing them really lifted my spirits. My daughter dropped off a walker this morning. It helped me to walk better than the cane. So glad I had a better day:)
  • That you reached out, and visited with your siblings. It is nice to get out even if it is just for a short while during recovery.

    Glad that you have a walker from your daughter, especially since you have been tripping/falling. I have one too, and found it very helpful in making me feel more secure after surgery. I am not using it now, but have it here for if I am going to be out for awhile.

    Hope you have another great day today. Wishing you all the best with your doctor. When does your husband go to find out about his leg?

    >:D< Karen
    >:D< >:-D< : Karen
    L3-S1 herniation and bulges, stenosis, mod facet,ddd,impinged nerves,coccydinia
    discectomy/lami July 2011-unsuccessful
    adr L5-S1 Feb 2012
  • Great that you have had a better day.
    Doesn't it make a difference to how you feel?
    This recovery is very much a mix of good and bad days.
    Hopefullly the good days will outnumber the bad days by a larger and larger amount until the bad days become unusual.

    This is a great place to off load your sad / negative emotions. People here understand and don't mind at all. We have been there, (and have got support ourselves from other members).

    Keep doing those things that make you feel better.
    Spending time with people you care about is great to raise your spirits. Treat yourself - you deserve it!

  • Tough day today. Couldn't sleep last night and slept half the day. My daughter is my only child and she called me today to tell me she's going to be moving to CA with her boyfriend. The subject came up about 2 months ago. She kept telling me she didn't think Steven was going to accept the job offer. Underneath it all, I knew this was coming. We are extremely close. This is tearing me up. My daughter has always been the joy in my life. I can't tell her not to go.

    My husband's appointment with the surgeon is this coming Wednesday. I know all of this is out of my control.

    I just feel like screaming "What about me?". They both need my support. I am doing all I can just to get through each day. I certainly didn't expect life to change just because I had to have another back surgery. All of this piling on is too much. I can't keep holding back the tears. I am afraid to wake up in the morning to see what happens next. I feel like I can't get any recovery between the pain, the Dr's, the house, the family, my husband's health and now my only child is moving across country.WTF I am beside myself. Does anyone here go through all of these things all at the same time like me? I hate to say it, this is typical of my life. I've been working so hard to break the cycle and it never ends. I am so done.
  • Sorry to hear about your daughter moving away. I couldn't have children so understand some loss that grieves me. I hope you get the help you need for your husband. I can't believe you have to do his foot dressing and wish a visiting Nurse could come and help out.

    It's very hard to downsize. I sold my house last summer and renting now so it's been difficult adjusting but just want you to know you will get through this. One day at a time. Keep venting away and reaching out for help.

    I found it helpful to have a walker Rollater now with a seat. Much better than a cane although going out on some of the rough sidewalks and on my street there are no sidewalks and it's a rough road so sometimes it's easier with a cane but love that I can sit down on the walker.

    Not sure if everything is so overwhelming for you please let your Dr. know this. Saying a prayer and sending positive thoughts. Find time for yourself and try to fit a walk in no matter how short daily. Take care. Charry
    DDD of lumbar spine with sciatica to left hip,leg and foot. L4-L5 posterior disc bulge with prominent facets, L5-S1 prominent facets with a posterior osteocartilaginous bar. Mild bilateral foraminal narrowing c-spine c4-c7 RN
  • My Mom also suggested the walker with the seat. I have to call my Dr. again today about pain meds and will ask how do I get one. I also want to get a handicapped parking sticker. My husband doesn't want to move. I think his attitude will change with his next surgery. He's also not the one that keeps falling. I need a place that will be easier to clean. I am up at earlier today so, let's see what happens. I will go for a walk. Hope you have a good day.
  • I'm so sorry you have to go through all this when you have your own health problems to deal with. I agree with Charry about talking to your doctor about what's been going on in your life; maybe he/she can suggest some resources so at least some of the load can be taken off your shoulders. Hang in there, and keep coming here to vent whenever you feel the need to. You've found the right place for that. Love 'n >:D< >:D< >:D< , Ess
  • Thank You you Ess for responding to me. I appreciate all of the support that everyone so generously gives me here. You really are keeping me going.

    My husband's appointment is actually Thursday instead of tomorrow. He is just not looking and feeling well over all. I am very nervous.

    My Dr. gave me minimal pain meds today. She gave me 4 Vicodin a day and it's 5mg. I talked to her last week and told her I needed more medication and she just refuses to understand that I know what I need. She wants me off all pain medication. I think I am going to have to find a new pain clinic that won't treat me like a criminal.

    I am starting to make jewelry again. This helps take my mind off of myself for awhile. If anyone would like to see some pics of my jewelry, pm me.
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