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Coping with daily pain

AlexcocoAAlexcoco Posts: 10
edited 06/11/2012 - 9:01 AM in Chronic Pain
I am new here. I have read a lot of topics and forums etc. while I feel so fortunate with only having one back surgery compared to others I am looking at my second one. I have daily pain that has hindered my life and what I do. It has affected my relationship as my partner doesn't understand pain. Once you have surgery isn't it supposed to go away? Uh no not always. I take a lot of medicines to control the pain like Opiates, neurontin for the nerve damage, Voltarin for inflammation, flexeril for muscles and ambien to try to sleep (which I still have problems). I feel like I don't know whether I am coming or going. I am just looking for acceptance and support. I'm also a great listener. Lol.


  • I will have to find the letters. My doctor actually suggested my partner coming to listen to what she has to say about my spine. At 30yrs old I was told I had the spine of a 70 yr old. I've had a very physical life and have had to adjust like you. And you are so right they think a simple backache is what we deal with on a daily basis. Not even close. I had my MRI 2 days ago and am awaiting my results. The times I have the hardest is in the middle of the night when I can't sleep because of the pain and I lay for countless hours and feel so alone. Now that I've found SH I can jump on and see who else is going thru the same thing. Thanks again!!
  • Tony is so right with his comments.

    And yes, the nights are sooooooo long, boring and extremely lonely. I have often stayed awake the whole night because I cannot get comfortable enough because of the pain no matter how much medication I take.

    You have to remember that there are thousands of people who have had back surgery and it has been 100 per cent successful. They may not post on SH any more because they are too busy working and are out living their lives to the full. So you are going to get the majority of people discussing all their ongoing problems. If you are feeling down about your own situation, and read SH at night, just bear this in mind. I wouldn't want you to think it's always going to be doom and gloom. It's just that, when everyone else is asleep and you feel like you're totally on your own, these things can paint a worse picture in the wee small hours.

    I'm only saying this from my own observations, that's all.

    I really hope your medications can be adapted to help you to control the pain better. Perhaps your specialists can try other tests/treatment before you have another operation. Are you able to request a second opinion?

    Will you let us know how your MRI results go?
    2 x Microdiscectomy 2005 / PLIFusion 2-level 2010 / revision surgery 2011 / NEVRO Senza spinal cord stimulator implanted February 2013. I WILL NOT GIVE IN / UP !!
  • I agree with the comments and "gloomy" feelings in the middle of the night. I also have stayed up all night and had to work the next day. I will for sure get a second opinion. I do not want to go thru another one as the first one was a must because I completely crushed my disc and twisted the vertebrae. I have tried therapy, injections, massage and I could go on and on. I love the comment from you that you wont give up or give in!!! You go girl! We have to stay positive.
    Thanks for your support and good luck to you.
  • Welcome to Spine-Health. I'm glad you found a good place, but sorry for the reason.

    So many people don't "get it", those of us with spine problems and ongoing pain issues. If you can't see it, it can't be there, right? I'm lucky that my hubby understands and is very supportive, but I think that's because since my problems started in 2008, I was so active, never complained, was alway up for anything, golfed a lot and when this happened I became a whole other person. He realizes that it's got to be something and having seen me through two surgeries and talking to my surgeon, he understands that I'm not the same and never will be.

    I still try to golf, although I only made 7 holes last weekend before I had to stop due to the pain.

    We do have to stay tough and deal with the days and nights where we just need to rest and can't do anything other than stay in our recliners or bed. But on those good days, it's good to do things we enjoy even knowing that it may knock us out the next day.

    Hang in there and I hope you find a way to sleep better. That's so key in feeling more normal than not.

  • Thanks for the welcome! I do believe the positive attitude is what gets you thru this. I do keep going even when I shouldn't. I've remodeled my house (very slowly) I fish an read all of the time. It's important to try to keep doing the things we loved in our pre-back problem days. Today I am outside painting so what does that tell you. Ha ha but tomorrow I might be down and out (I can't be I have to work) I'm just waiting the MRI results and then I will be able to go from there. I can't live on the pain pills and muscle relaxers as I have been. I don't function too well.

    Thanks again and have fun golfing as you can

  • Everyone person has a different path to walk, and a different set of challenges, so I can only speak for myself.

    What gets me by after a grueling day of unending pain is giving back to others with similar challenges via some new work I will doing sound bringing integrative medicine and coaching to chronic pain and illness sufferers.

    Exploring my own treatment options, what are the new cutting edge choices for me and others. Sharing it when I can be of help.

    Laughter, not taking myself so seriously. Doing what I love in moderation. Keeping track of what works and what does not. I find exercise to be a challenge given I was an athlete that pushed through pain.

    Being mindful and present, in gratitude for all the beauty around me, and for the support and love of friends, family. Curious, beginner mind.

    Being in community and connected.. I work hard to stay out of the cave.

    I ask for help,now! Huge challenge for me! And candidly sometimes, I just whinge, whine, complain and vent!

    That is what works for me.

    What works for you?


  • i am on my third operation {the last one was a massive ALIF fusion 12 weeks ago] it will take me around 2 years to recover from it .i am still suffering with pain .
    unfortunately spinal operation don't always remove pain .that's why so many of us continue to suffer long after the operation scars have gone .i have been in pain for near on 16 years and in that time i have lost my first wife/job/home and and and ... i am remarried and have a nice home now but i have been through hell and back over the years ..just like many on here
    you have joined an unfortunate club !! and back pain tends to get worse over time .pain control and learning to cope is the only way to deal with it .i hope that you don't need another operation ..but if you do make sure the consultant is the best ..there is no room for mistakes where your spine is concerned.
    many partners don't understand ..and why would they? they can't feel you pain .and many people have back pain at sometime in there lives and they think that what you are going through is the same ..ITS NOT.that's why ;;;back pain ;;; gets a bad name ..say at work or with family members ...some may think that you are just lazy we here at SH know the difference .its very hard to deal with and even after 16 years i still get frustrated that i can't live the life i want to i have had to adjust my life to cope and its very difficult i often get upset and annoyed because i can't do stuff that i could only a few years ago....let you partner read two.letter ..you can find them both on her just enter them in the find box on the top of the page
    one is the spoons theory and the other is letter o a normal ..both well written and they explain to someone without pain what its like to suffer every day
    tony {UK}
    1997 laminectomy
    2007 repeat laminectomy and discectomy L4/L5
    2011 ALIF {L4/L5/S1}
    2012 ? bowel problems .still under investigation
    2014 bladder operation may 19th 2014
  • Well what works for me, is countless hours reminding myself about how lucky I am and how I could have it so much worse. I feel fortunate that I am surrounded by a loving family and friends. I'm still working although barely. I try walking but am in so much pain. I love my animals that keep me going. Their unconditional love moves me. I go to a massage therapist but can't lay on my stomach anymore. I got a call two days ago that my MRI was abnormal. I have to go back into doctor to discuss my options. Its not anything I didn't already know. But my doc is on vacation so it's going to be the 18th. Just more waiting. Not looking forward to another surgery but I'm afraid I've injured it too bad to let go for much longer. But you gotta be thankful for spending time with your family on Easter. Keep your chin up!!!
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