I go back to work tomorrow and I don't know how I feel about it.
I've had 3 months off recovering from my 2 level cervical ADR, however, prior to that I was off for a month with all sorts of awful eye infections.
Last year I was off for over 4 months recovering from 2 seperate lumbar decompressions. I hope I can put this behind me now but the simple truth is that I just don't know.
I don't know if I have had long enough off, I don't know if this is as good as it's going to get, I don't know if I will ever return to unrestricted duties, I don't know if the numbness in my fingers means my surgery has failed, I don't know if the tingling in my thigh means further problems in my back, I don't know if I have to accept that this is my lot, I don't know if this time next year I will be happily running fun runs, I don't know if this time next year I will be horse riding again, I don't know if I will wake up feeling all my fingers again :?
I see my NS on Wednesday, I don't know if he can answer any of those questions for me.
I HATE NOT KNOWING