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Community Pool etiquette - RANT

AnonymousUserAAnonymousUser Posts: 49,671
edited 06/11/2012 - 8:19 AM in Water Cooler
So, our "luxury" apartment complex has a nice pool and hot tub. Swimming daily has really been helping my back and I've really been enjoying it. My fiance got me some goggles so I could really swim without worrying so much about my contacts or going blind without my glasses. I don't expect to be able to swim "real" laps - it's a fairly large complex and sometimes there are quite a frew people there. I avoid "peak" times, like weekend afternoons and usually go in the early evening (7pm or so). Today when I went the pool was pretty full, so I found a small corner where I could swim around a little bit by myself (it's not a standard shaped pool, pretty asymetrical).

There was a couple keeping to themselves in another area and another older couple with a toddler in the pool as well. I always respect other people's swimming space and expect others to respect mine. The problem is is that there was a large group of people hanging out in the deep end, no problem, since I had found my corner. It was a fifty-ish woman and six(!) adult children (I'd say around my age - early to mid twenties). At first they were just shooting water guns at each other, but then the matriarch started making "games" for her "kids" to play. She started throwing pool - like billards balls - into the water for the others to run and catch. Fine, no problem, but then she threw four or so of them directly into where I was swimming. All six of the "kids" started swimming directly towards me! Mid stroke, I stood up and lifted my arms and looked right at her - she said, "we're playing a game!" And I said, "Can't I have a small corner to swim in?" Everybody in the pool stopped and looked at me. So the girls came over and got their balls, making snide remarks the whole time. I was mad, but I did not want to give them the satisfaction of leaving, yet. The young couple came over and practically had to smoosh themselves against the edge of the pool in the area I was in, and the couple and the little girl got out, since the others had totally taken over the whole pool with their game. Then they couldn't find one of their balls and kept coming over, I honestly think they though I took it - like I was hiding it in my little bitty bikini. I stayed for a while longer, but I didn't get in as much swimming as I would have liked. We pay a lot in rent at this place, and everyone is fully entitled to use the amenities.

Am I wrong to think that they should have realized that they were not entitled to the whole entire pool and that they should have respected the fact that others were in teh pool, too? I now regret speaking up, and admit that I wasn't real nice about it, but I think I spoke for everyone it the pool; I just wish others had said something, too. Also, I know that we are only limited to two guests in the pool or exercise areas, had it been office hours I really would have gone into the apt office and tattled. This woman is not supposed to be having a pool party, as the amenities are for all the residents, not just her. I am generally not this kind of person, either, I just think it wasn't fair or them, and I really hate it when things aren't fair :P

Thanks for listening, I am just so mad and wanted to vent. Do you think that I should call the apartment office and ask them to send out reminders about limiting guests at the pool? This is not the first time I've seen huge groups of people out there, and they are supposed to pay a fee to have a party, so that the pool area would be closed for a certain period of time. Or should I just get over it and stop stressing about stupid piddly things? People really don't have any respect or consideration for others, do they?


  • From your description of events, I think you were completely justified in speaking-up. Please do not regret it. As for the others, they just didn't have your courage.

    Lodge a complaint. YOU pay for that pool.
  • you should give them back there ball and swim laps in your bathtub. LMAO !!!!!

    Honestly why get all bent out of shape over petty crap.
    let it go.........life is not fair if it was we would not be reading this post.

    Really now think about the time it took to write this post ,and think about you never getting that time back.

    the key words in your story where..........
    " Or should I just get over it and stop stressing about stupid piddly things? " YES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :? :jawdrop:
  • Can you get a little more descriptive of the "itty bitty bikini"??????

    It's just that I would better be able to voice an opinion if I had all the facts. ;)
  • I know it's piddly - but the point is, that despite the fact that I KNEW that, it was still bothering me. Writing it here really helped me get it off my chest. I'm sorry i wasted your time.
  • You have helped so many especially in Pain Med forum. Your experience and education from "the other side of the counter" is invaluable.

    What you felt was not piddly. What happened was not piddly. Someone intruded on your space and you stood up for yourself. Congratulations!!!

    Write here all you want. We all have a choice of reading a thread, responding or just moving on. If it helps to post it, you haven't wasted anyone's time.

    I stand by my first reply. If my second one was over the line, let me know and i will delete it.
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,859
    Hi Rosetta

    Reading your post brings up some valid points.

    - People can be Rude and show no respect to others

    That woman wanting to have fun with those kids is fine, but do it so it does not interfere with other people. I have seen things like this (not in pools) many times. It shows a great amount of no respect for other human beings. People like that feel they are entitled and can do whatever they want. And with that kind of attitude, just thing how their children turn out.

    - When you Pay for a Service you should be allowed to use those services.

    I see this at our our Lake community. We pay a yearly fee which includes our Boat Slips and Golfing at our 9hole course and Tennis, all at no additional charges. Many times, when we go to use our boat, there are kids on the docks fishing. The make it almost impossible to pass. First they are not allowed on the docks but they make it difficult to use something you are paying for.

    So, overall, I think this is a question of People Respecting People. And to me that is a BIG thing.

    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • I think you did the right thing, and I am glad you said something!--Mazy
  • I knew what I might me getting myself into when I reread that part, lol. I was just trying to make my point that I couldn't have taken thier ball, unless I either stuck it into my suit or swallowed it!

    I'm taking a few vacation days here and there this week month and I would have ususally ranted to my co-workers, so you guys are my stand-ins. Thanks!

    People just aren't taught manners or respect anymore. Like when you go to Wal-Mart and people just let their kids run around by themselves and tear the place apart, not to mention that they don't watch where they're going and run right into you. I just live in an area of the world that is totally different from most places. People around here just have too much of the "Boulder mentality" or entitlement complex - I'm sure I'm guilty of that plenty myself, but I try very hard not to be. It should be a life's requirement that everyone have to work in some sort of service type job. My parents are prime examples of this - neither ever worked in retail and can't understand how I "let" myself end up being career Walgreens (I have a degree, after all -so does everybody else!). I can't stand going places with my dad, because he is so rude to store workers or drive through personnel and it is so embarassing!

    Anyway, thanks guys, I should probably find something better to do on my mini-vacation than sit here on the computer. I'm hoping that there will be a lot less people at the pool, since I would imagine most people are at work.
  • I think you acted appropriately in this situation. You have a right for people to respect you! If they don't do it, stand up for yourself. I'm glad that you posted what happened, especially if it made you feel better! ">image
  • I can so relate to this! I too think you were right in saying something, especially when you pay to use that pool.

    I am on a vanpool and we travel to work well over an hour each way. Since we leave at 5:15 am everyone sleeps, and sleeps or reads in the afternnon. We have a new rider and people were complaining to me how she, one day when I was absent, talked on her cell phone all the way home so nobody could get to sleep. But nobody would say anything to her! Just a simple request and it doesn't have to be nasty. Well I sit next to this gal and yesterday she was quite late in the afternoon and we had to wait for her so I was already irritated. She's already talking on her cell when she gets on. I gave her some time to end the call because it's not like we have a rule about this, it's just common sense that it's rude to the others on the vanpool and I guess you'd say it's an unwritten rule. So I waited until we made our three other stops to pick up riders which took about 10-15 minutes, then tapped her on the arm. Did I mention she was talking really loud? I simply said, "Excuse me but just about everyone on this van likes to sleep on the way home, and they'll likely get upset with someone talking on the phone all the way home, so you might want to cut it short." Hmmm, I guess I did tend to blame it on everyone else, eh? I wasn't trying to sleep, I was trying to read and couldn't with someone sitting next to me going, "Oh no girlfriend, he did NOT say that!" etc, etc, loudly. She DID cut the call short, then just sat there for quite a while before saying, "So, we aren't allowed to talk on the phone at all?" And I said, no, that's not the case, everyone needs to use their phone occasionally, just that I heard that someone talked all the way home the other day and everyone was upset because they couldn't nap. I didn't tell her I knew it was her.

    Don't get me started on the kids in WalMart. OMG! It's the screaming that gets me the most and the older I get, the more it bothers me. And I am not above saying something to someone else's kid.

    That's a good idea about everyone having to work a service job for a while. I was a waitress for a while so now I'm a heavy tipper. On the other side, we get a lot of customer service training here at work and when I'm getting bad customer service elsewhere I NOTICE. Some people in the service industry should not be there. We have a cashier in our cafeteria that constantly complains about her job to her customers. I told her once that she should find another job if she's so unhappy.

    Hmmm...I don't think I'm a bitch, but this post sure makes it sound that way, huh?

  • It was a joke......didn't you see the LOL/LMAO ? :D
    I would have done the same thing.
    Hope your feeling better.
  • dilaurodilauro ConnecticutPosts: 9,859
    The examples that have been posted here are all so real.
    Seems like many people just do not feel they are responsible for anything. To them its so easy to point to the other person.

    We get that a lot were we live. Its a relatively small community (180 homes), with about 40% of them summer folks only living at other locations the rest of the year. During the summer, we have our share of 1) Kids taking other people's Golf cart for night rides, 2) Kids sitting on boats that do not belong to them, etc.
    When these kids are confronted and their parents contacted, we way too often get "No, my child would never do that!"
    That always sends me off the wall. I have much more respect for anyone that will assume responsibility for their actions.

    Ok, enough of my soap box, back to the forums!
    Ron DiLauro Spine-Health System Administrator
    I am not a medical professional. I comment on personal experiences
    You can email me at: rdilauro@veritashealth.com
  • I say yes, you should not be afraid or feel guilty about reporting someone that is blatantly ignoring rules, regulations, or policies set forth by the community. Those policies are in place for a reason, and nine times out of ten benefit the resident.

    I must say though that listening to some of the other comments here in this thread make me laugh. I am not one to get so upset over "little" things. Life is meant to be lived. Find a rule of your own to ignore or break at least once! :P ;)
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